Underage drinking? Try a gay bar.

A picture of dead moron Jacob Robida in his mom's shitty ass house.

On February 2nd, 2006 at around midnight, Jacob Robida walked into a gay bar in New Bedford, Masschusetts. He had a few drinks, then he pulled out some weapons (a gun and a hatchet) and critically injured three patrons before fleeing. After several days on the run, Robida was fatally injured in a shootout with Arkansas police. Since that time, the media has been looking for someone to blame for his actions. FOX25 News blamed Robida's favorite band, Insane Clown Posse. New Bedford's mayor blamed violent video games. The Boston Herald took the banality a step further and blamed Southern white supremacy groups including the White Freedom Party and the Ku Klux Klan. Since blaming Robida for his own actions would clearly be irrational and irresponsible, here's an idea: blame the gays. Now first off, I am not a homophobe and I have no problem with queers. The gays can gay it up until the gay cows come home and then they can fuck the cows too for all I care. But here's the problem: Jacob Robida was only 18 years old.

I remember watching the news the night after the shooting happened and seeing bartender Phillip Daggett describe what happened that night. His lisp barely masked by his tearful delivery and his Boston accent, Daggett told reporters that he had served Robida two shots of liquor shortly before the terror began. Hey asshole, maybe if either you or the bouncer had bothered to card Jake instead of trying to size up his fresh young meat, none of this would have happened. The fact that it's illegal to serve alcohol to people under the age of 21 never occurred to you, did it fag? Of course not, you were too busy wondering what a strange new dick might feel like in your mouth. The American media has provided extensive coverage of this story on a national level and it is totally undeserving of it. In 2004, an average of 3,735 violent crimes were committed every day and many of them barely made it into local police reports. But the Robida incident was a hate crime, so it's somehow especially tragic. Boo fucking hoo. Maybe this will teach those limp-wristed retards to check IDs instead of cock size.

1,122,348 underage men will pretend to be gay so they can get trashed.

haddox@sydlexia.com

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© 2006 by Haddox