Why I'm Not Updating

A lot of people have been emailing me asking me why the hell I haven't updated the site. Well here is why: I recently signed a book deal so I have been spending all my time on that. Okay, that's a fucking lie. I was able to crank out over 150 pages of my usual bullshit in just under two hours. So basically, the book was done the same day that I signed with the publisher. But until the book comes out, it is not in my best interest to update. After all, why would you pay $19.95 for 150 pages of the same crap you've been reading for free for years? You wouldn't, so I'm holding the site hostage. So if you want to see new shit, buy my book. Here are the details:

Publisher: Golden Books
Release Date: June 6, 2006
Page count: 152
Title: Beat Your Girlfriend (Or I Will)

Mark that date on your calendars. If you shitheaps don't get my book onto the New York Times Best Seller List, you can say goodbye to new content forever. Oh, and buy my other merchandise too.

1,994,137 people must buy my book before I update again.

haddox@sydlexia.com

Back to how much I rule...

2006 by Haddox